When I was in JSS1 I fell in hate with my social studies teacher, Madam SS. We were getting along pretty well till her niece and I found ourselves in the same dormitory. The foolish niece (who I’m now friends with) told her aunt a lie about me in order to save someone else’s behind and the agbaya teacher decided to make an eleven year old child her enemy.
From the second Madam SS entered the class till she left, she picked on me. I became an answering machine. “Define this, define that.” “Explain this, explain that.” Unfortunately for Madam S I was a clever kid, she could never catch me out. It annoyed the hell out of her. I can’t tell you how many times she punished me for no tangible reason.
“Did you have to answer the question so cockily?! Kneel down there!”
“So because you answered one question you think you know everything? Get out of my class!”
The woman made my life miserable but I paid her back by getting the highest grades in her class. I was glad to see the back of JSS1 though and thought I’d gotten rid of her but alas, we met again in JSS3. We picked up where we’d left off; she fired questions, I bombed her with answers. It burnt her gan and she retaliated by telling my demonic English teacher to watch out for me in her classes. Two teachers against lil’ ol’ MEE, talk about bullying!
Fast forward three years. I was now the house captain of my house and JSS1 girls were resuming school. I got a message that Madam SS wanted to see the house captain of my house. Wondering what I’d done this time, I dragged myself to her office. She was shocked when I walked in.
“You are the house captain?!”
“My daughter is in JSS1 and she’s in your house. She’s resuming boarding house today.”
Hallelujah!!! I’ve never felt more powerful in my life.
“Please my dear, please look after her for me. God will bless you!”
Madam SS grovelling? Begging me?! Praying for me?!
The thought of the many ways I could torture her daughter had me drunk …O n se mi bi oti! I had all the power and she knew it. No amount of begging was going to save her daughter’s behind. There and then I started inventing new improved punishments for the girl. Let her not wake up at 6am sharp to start scrubbing, walahi, she would hang upside down! Forget the toppling of Saddam, this one was sweeter! Madam SS started sending me Mr Biggs and cold water every other day. She spoke highly of me to every teacher in the staff room and fanned my ego till the thing caught pneumonia.
Truth be told, I wasn’t going to do a thing to her daughter but Madam SS didn’t need to know that. Revenge is sweet gan!!!