Tales From The Underground: How To Bag A Date With A Stranger

I love construction workers. They know how to make even Fiona from Shrek feel like the hottest chic to ever walk the  earth. I’ll concede they can be rude at times but if you don’t take yourself too seriously, you’ll be alright. This morning I stood between four builders on the train. They were sitting and the princess in me was a bit miffed that none of them was gentleman enough to offer me his seat. One of them fancied himself a lothario and hoping to score a seat, I indulged him small.

“You know you’re really pretty don’t you?!’

I smiled and thanked him.

“So are you from around here?”

“I am but you’re clearly not judging by your accent.”

“Yeah, I’m from south wales. I’m in London for a few months on a job.”

“Good for you.”

“You look like you could do with a seat.”

“I wouldn’t turn yours down if you offered.”

“On my laps though sugar.”

I laughed. “Not on your life mate.”

He winked. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

I opened up my Metro and began reading. If the guy wasn’t going to stand up, there was no point to the banter.

At the next stop a pretty brunette girl got on the train. Lothario winked at his friends and started working his magic.

“Are the trains always this crowded?”

“They are at this time!”

“I’m not from around here so I’m not used to this.”

“Oh, where are you from?”

“I’m from South Wales but I’m working in London for a few months.”

“Nice! Do you like it here?”

“It’s alright but I don’t know anyone in these parts so I never know where to go to have fun.”

“Aaw,that’s a shame. London’s a fun city.”

“Sounds like you know all the hot spots! I’m not trying to be funny but I’ll buy you a drink if you promise to show me around town.”

As you can tell, I wasn’t really reading my paper. My amebo antenna was fully erect! I have to give him credit, he was charming the pants off the girl and she was letting them pool round her ankles.

“I’m not sure I should, I don’t know you.”

“Let’s rectify that then! Come on, I don’t bite. Give me an hour and if you don’t enjoy my company, I won’t make you go home with me.”

You should have seen the twinkle in his big brown eyes. Even I was tempted to say yes to his proposal and he wasn’t talking to me! Nevertheless, I was shocked when she agreed without much persuasion and watched in awe as she handed over her number. Is it that easy to bag a date?! I was still trying to get over my shock when he stood up, pulled her in for a hug, kissed her on the cheek…AND SAT BACK DOWN. Her number, a hug and a kiss later and he still didn’t offer her his seat. Shio!

Poor girl. I sure hope all she’s after is a one night stand or else it’ll be heartbreakforamugu.co.uk!




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